Dreams are dreams, until they come true

It's been a hectic time in my life and Lord knows that sometimes I don't know if I'm coming or going.
Nevertheless, every once in a while I stop and get the birdseye view and realize this is what it looks like when your dream comes true.
Who ever thought I would be standing here presenting my poster from Mayo Clinic at an international surgeons meeting in Vancouver ?
I'm so proud to be part of the Mayo clinic Hematology and Oncology fellowship and so thankful for the opportunities it has presented me, to care for patients and make a small difference in the academic community.

Learning is a life long process and it forever keeps me humble.

"Lord help me out because half the time I don't know what I get myself into..."

Location:Vancouver, BC

Thankful

Sitting here it's been a rough couple of months, but I couldn't be more thankful. For a husband with strong enough shoulders to carry me through the valleys, for a family that never grows tired of hearing about my struggles and a God with merciful hands to wipe my tearless eyes and patch the holes in my heart created by the voids I can not fill for my patients.
At the end of the day as an oncologist I realize, perhaps the most, that I'm grateful to be ...sitting here.

Location:Home

Priorities

As I go to bed feeling defeated from not being able to understand the topic I have agreed to write an expert review article on, I will re-read the results of my patient with double hit lymphoma a once likely death sentence that is 100 days out from transplant without evidence of lymphoma and 9 months from diagnosis, feeling well and enjoying life.

Happiness is loving what you do... And doing what you love.

Beauty through pain

Sometimes it takes the deepest of pain to see the purity of happiness.

B. Ernst, MD
Dept of Hematology & Oncology
Mayo clinic

Happiness is loving what you do... And doing what you love.

Epiphanies in Oncology

While I don't know what tomorrow will bring, I count myself lucky because I have today.

-me

As this year comes to a close I can truly say this

As this year comes to a close I can truly say this has been the hardest year of my life. I have fallen to depths I've never known and found the most painful of moments. I have watched families say good bye and spoken the worst of utterances
I have heard the heart ache
I have felt the fury
I have dreamed the nightmares
I have dried so many of my own tears.
I have felt stupid and sad and guilty and intimidated
I have experienced triumph and surprise and I have witnessed true grace and courage and strength
And through all of this I have found my own strength to wake up again and face another day.
...another family, another child, another mother, or sister or lover, another heartache another sunset and hope for another victory.




B. Ernst, MD
Dept of Hematology & Oncology
Mayo clinic

Happiness is loving what you do... And doing what you love.

The decisions we make

B. Ernst, MD
Dept of Hematology & Oncology
Mayo clinic

Happiness is loving what you do... And doing what you love.